The Sanctifying Spouse

In his mercy the God the Father directs our paths and makes us holy continually. Through moments of his grace, if we respond, we may indeed be brought closer to him. For some people these moments of grace and sanctification come when listening to sacred songs. They are moved deep within and accept the call of the still small voice they hear singing through the tones to which they listen. For others the preaching of others may prick their hearts in a special way. God seems to speak to all through his word and the labor, worship, and sacraments of the Church of his Son, Jesus Christ. Yet, God sanctifies us, or makes us more holy, through the relationships in which we are engaged as well. To be sure, the friendships and acquaintances we find ourselves enveloped in through the years have profound effect on us. Yet few relationships carry the power for God to work through than does the bond of marriage.

Relatively few examples of a truly balanced husband and wife relationship are to be found in scripture. All too often, as a result of the cultural norms of the day women were left unnamed in the annals of Biblical history. But there are a few examples of which to take note: 1) Abraham and Sarah- They seem to get each other into trouble more than anything, yet Peter pays tribute to Sarah's example of a holy wife in 1 Peter 3. 2) Manoah and Wife- Found in Judges 13, the parents of Samson: Set forth a good example of a couple working together to determine God's will and intent. 3) Elkhanah and Hanna- Found in 1 Samuel. Okay, there was a second wife Peninah too. But the story centers on the relationship of Elkhanah and Hannah and the conception of Samuel. Again a husband and wife team works together to discern God's will. (As you may be noticing all of these instances involve a woman whose womb is barren.) Of course, there are many others: Aquila and Priscilla, Hosea and Wife, Zachariah and Elizabeth, Joseph and Mary, Ruth and Boaz; all glimpses of Biblical married life.

In almost all of the above cases this is true: God works through one or both spouses to change either how they view each other or how they view God. Truly, again and again, marriage is proven to be a powerful means of grace.
Have you surrendered yourself to your spouse and to God? Are you allowing God to use your spouse or significant other to change you? Are you allowing God to use the difficulties and trials of married life to bring you closer to his heart, to sanctify you? If not consider the doors you have shut to God's grace working in your life. Take Abraham and Sarah for example. More than once they came to a pivotal point in their life and were divided over what was best to do. When in danger in Egypt Abraham instructed Sarah to pretend to be his sister. When Sarah was barren she led Abraham to Hagar. They were listening to each other all right, just at the worst possible times!

Now consider Hosea who married a woman of the culture of his day. It was a culture obsessed with sex and prostitution. Yet, though she strayed again and again Hosea remained loyal to her and would bring her home, wash her wounds and nurse her back to health. Through him Gomer, that was her name, was eventually redeemed. You can be certain that Hosea's sacrifice for her brought him closer to God as well. This is the Biblical hope for marriage. As Christ loved us, husbands are to love their wives (Ephesians 5:25). Out of reverence to Christ (and certainly to the benefit of our relationship with him) we are to also submit ourselves to one another (Ephesians 5:21).

From time to time we may joke about marriage. We may tire of the effort it takes. We may grow weary of the never ending change it demands. Yet, we must realize that it is through a Christ centered marriage that God makes grace available. Thank God for your spouse this evening and thank your spouse for being themselves. The next time trials come cling to them and submit to them. After all, God may be trying to tell you something.